So I went to Katie's party tonight.

I felt good about myself, but that's not important.

What is important is that I found out something about myself. Out of context, it's a good thing. In context, it's a very, very bad thing, and it's disturbing that I am this way. But no matter what the case, this will either turn my life upside-down or eat away at me until I go crazy.

And most importantly, I don't think there's anyone who I can talk to about it, because frankly, the three people I trust most in the world are the three people who would be affected by this.

So I feel good about myself. For the most part.

And this is the most difficult thing in the world for me right now.

I thought it was very movie-like when I stood in front of the mirror and hummed "It's a wonderful world" to myself. Now, though, every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end. And this is so sad...
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