After a day that went by quickly, moving in slow-motion, I had to sit in a pep rally. Which no one cared about, really. We're cynical, jaded, unenthused teenagers. We're supposed to go to a pep rally? I don't care.
I didn't leave the gym. I went to Volleyball.
Depressing because no one could pass. I don't pass normally, so it was OK on my end, but still... I felt like I did something wrong. And I didn't. I was trying.
I'm not playing next year, no matter how much mom says wait until next year to decide.
I'm not.
I'm not.
No.
So, ride home, dinner, Simcity. Simcity, simcity, simcity.
The forums are pissing the hell out of me. I don't like to check the messages. They frighten me.
I'm on break. It doesn't feel like it, with volleyball and college visits. Somehow, I worry that I'm losing my safeties.
Maybe I fell apart and didn't realize it.
I'm recreating myself. I am. I'm putting myself back together. I'm moving away from artist. I'm becoming musician. I'm becoming coder. I'm becoming songwriter. I'm becoming citybuilder.
I broke myself up and put myself back together, and maybe i'll come out different.
I hope so.