Yesterday, I did nothing in any of my classes. I talked about technology with Mr. Yanek, who I really wish would teach my class next year. After the last period, I met up with carl. We figured that before we had to meet up with Savitre at 5PM, we could go play some videogames. We played some conqueror, and Carl and JP enjoyed themselves. And I guess that was alright.
We left as soon as it started raining.
Of course, my cell phone doesn't work well in the rain. I was screaming into the phone before anyone heard anything. Savitre left me a message and sounded upset about something, but I couldn't understand it. I assumed the plans were off, and Carl and I were about to head back when she called us. It was still pouring rain, and she said she stopped at Lorena's house.
Which is two blocks from school.
We took the Lincoln bus to the Davis. The movie was good, but I was shivering through the whole thing (air conditioned, and I'd just been swimming in my clothes, so to speak). I walked out with a migraine, Carl walked out with terrible lung pains. We got McDonald's and went to the nursing home that Mom of Lorena works at to eat.
Meeting an old friend for the first time in two years was not what it should be. Savitre was as quiet as she'd ever been. I didn't feel interested or really envigored. I joked around, and made her laugh, at best, but it wasn't an oh-my-god feeling. Truth be told, I'm not terribly excited about meeting up with her tomorrow. I've left my grade school behind, she felt like no more than an acquaintance. I don't know.
"MarkoDePollo: Ian just proposed a saturday thing this monday.
MarkoDePollo: I don't terribly want to go.
menigma3: why not?
menigma3: well, I probably know why not.
MarkoDePollo: I talked to carl alot about how social groups develop today.
MarkoDePollo: it was a good discussion. I was talking about how getting back together with Savitre yesterday evening felt meaningless, he said it was because our school wasn't tightly knit."
I still had my migraine when I took the peterson bus home. I called my mom for a ride and she drove carl and I home. I went to bed at ten, aching. I had a fun time at the movie and just joking around, but it wasn't special.
This morning I was exhausted. The pain took away my energy. It felt like I had barely slept. So off I went - Physics, English, Latin, all quite easy. In the second floor atrium, I took a look at everyone going to TNT and sat down.
I didn't terribly want to go.
Looking at Adam and Geoff and Heather and all these people who just come, I realized that there were more people who I didn't want to come than who I did want to come who were coming.
We went to TNT.
So Heather gets motion sickness while playing Firearms and has to play CS. This makes no sense, and we've told Heather to try again, because there's no reason she'd get sick from Firearms, but she refuses. Today, when JP quit playing Firearms to play CS, I was kind of pissed. I yelled at JP some. Heather said that she doesn't make fun of *my* games.
Excuse me?
"Fuck you. I HATE CS, and furthermore, it's not YOUR game. By the way, Fuck you."
I angrily stomped back to Firearms.
When we left, I walked far enough ahead with Russ to talk to him about how my idealistic images of my friends are all being shattered.
We stopped at McDonalds to burn his time until he had to meet with Deana. We talked about ways to get Geoff dead in shadowrun, mostly. Just about RPGing and such.
When we caught the bus, Adam and I got along. We made fun of Geoff and talked about RPGing, and I got invited to his house to observe an RPGing session tomorrow.
"PLPenguin42: so
PLPenguin42: you and adam spent a day not making fun of each other
PLPenguin42: i think i saw some pigs flying
PLPenguin42: and hell looks really cold today
MarkoDePollo: ha.
PLPenguin42: and he invited you over his house tomorrow, too
MarkoDePollo: i know."
Russ and I talked about the Drums and Bass sound of Deleted when we got to the bus station. He got on a train and got lost looking for Deana.
I've been talking to deana for the last two hours, writing this entry for the last 1:30.
Bad things happen. I don't really want to talk to anyone, I'm overall disgusted with peoples' flaws, and am disinterested in other people. What a terrible thing to say, yeah? I'm a cold person this week. Socialites become sociopaths, groups degenerate into other groups into other groups into other groups. It doesn't matter, really, it doesn't. Maybe it does. I'm not sure I know anymore. I'm just rambling at this point, throwing off diary phrases that you hear time and time again, trite cliches.
I don't really want to think about it.
What a lovely day it has been. Everything's different, but that's alright with me, because it's not that bad to be disenchanted with your friends, I guess. I just need some time off. Doing what, I couldn't tell you. I have two and a half months to figure that one out.