I'm extremely erratic, I realize. I'm stepping back for a bit.

I'm thinking... about my friends.

I can relate it to when I got banned from the rinkworks chatroom. I remember a specific conversation I had about how boring I found one of the chats. I was sort of dissecting my relationships with friends in the past. I was reading a lot of old-at-young, for old time's sake. And I started thinking about people who have fun, and I started looking at pictures of people who have fun. I read some Niki, and some Sam, and it overall was a lonely experience.

This solidifies my need for a group.

But the thing is that my depression is stemming from not so much wanting to do what others do, but wanting to derive such unmitigated happiness from it. Because, while creativity and effort are certainly something to envy, I've been having a good time with playing Grand Theft Auto in my basement.

Still, the need for legacy is unrelenting, and friendship reigns important.
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