2:53 a.m.
March 27, 2006
1. AOL.
Friends of Note: BJ, and someone whose name I don't remember so I'll just call Ray Bradbury.
Notes: None. I was probably nine, it doesn't matter.
2. RinkWorks.
Not many close friends, but I did happen to get banned from there for being an asshole. I was probably twelve, anyhow.
3. SFF -> SFD
Had a lot of friends. Alma, Keruri, 'Trinity', Joz, Nicole, Kayla (by proxy), Lobe, Spud. Some disappeared, some just dwindled. Kayla's still alright to be around, Keruri gets a mention up in herre. It was a lot of fun in those days. I was a little bit naive about everything, but I drew a lot, and as long as I was more easily amused, I was prolific. I don't think anyone really disliked me. I fit in. And then everything fell apart because of forces outside of me, and it sucked.
4. TSO. Cre, Jen, Narb. You know my deal with Cre here. I have no idea if I'll ever speak to her again, but I'd like to. Jen was a terrible situation, where she was a jerk. She got in touch lately, and I... was a jerk. And it's complicated. But I felt more forgiving after I ranted meanly. I don't know if she's on the same plane. Narb... He disappeared. He was a good guy.

5. SPS. Erika, Katy, Betsy, Eva, Emily, Claudia.
What a trainwreck. I think it was through the process of leaving this piece of shit outfit that I realized what I didn't like about people. For a while I just categorized them as awful people, but I realized even people on my side I didn't quite get along with (Read: Eva). I learned a lot about myself in the process - notably, that I engineer my personality and my reactions to people not so much to be abrasive and obnoxious, but so that people who don't like me leave me alone. It's subconscious, mostly, but I don't make any attempt at befriending ignorant or otherwise dumb people - my personality adapts so as to look unfriendly to them, and friendly to everyone worth my while. Unfortunately, things develop. Truth be told, I'm glad I had the experience. I believe the headaches I caused the administration there were rightfully some of the best work I've ever done. I'm proud that I annoyed them.

6. RO: Dan, Avery.
I'm proud of myself for finding Dan, prouder that we had something in common. It was unfortunate that we never spoke outside the game. Avery is an acquired personality that has taken me a VERY long time to appreciate. In fact, were she not bound to me by the constructs of games, I would have ignored her long ago. But in the end, she's alright.

7. SL.
Arani, Pho, Neb.
Finally, something where I'm socially confident - but, unfortunately, at times somewhat disinterested. I can make friends but I can't maintain larger networks. I'm a smaller force, both physically and metaphorically. I love Arani, she's been superfriendly to me, if not superbusy. Pho makes me feel good about myself.
prev
next
archive